The interruption above was due to the explosion of an atomic bomb! When the announcement came that there was to be no postponement we all gathered on deck as the fateful second approached. The Haven was approximately 10 miles from the target area. The bomb was exploded on the exact second. A sight I'll never forget. We had a perfect view. Could see the Saratoga and Arkansas between which the bomb was set off. As you have heard over the radio, the Arkansas sank immediately -- it must have gone down like a rock because it was gone when the cloud cleared. The Saratoga went down very slowly, taking the final plunge about 16:00 (4 PM). I was on deck watching the final plunge through binoculars lent me by one of the English Naval officers aboard. I can't help having a strange feeling of sadness when I think that only last Tuesday I had lunch aboard her in the officers mess -- a very excellent lunch.
The waste and destruction of so much fine equipment is tragic no matter how it is justified by arguments of expediency. Yet no one else seems to be in the least concerned about it all. I suppose I'm just naive.
The explosion itself was a splendid sight, a marvelous show. It is very difficult to describe because it all happened so quickly at first -- the initial burst of orange red -- a column of fire shooting vertically out of a calm sea, then the huge spreading bubble which immediately engulfed the ships and blotted them from view. As this bubble or negative wave disappeared there was the huge solid column of wake rising like a marble pillar for 5000 feet. As it reached its maximum height the spray and vapor cloud began spreading out until the whole mass resembled a huge oak tree. Then the water fell back -- a tremendous deluge of radioactive deadly water -- as the vapor rose higher to 9 or 10 thousand feet. All the while a huge doughnut of vapor was spreading out to a diameter of 5 or 6 miles at the base. The entire fleet was obscured almost from the very first. All that was seen of the ships was the small one which had been anchored above the bomb and was thrown high on the water spout.
The sound reached us one minute after the explosion as a dull boom accompanied by a puff of breeze. There was no shock and the wave did not get beyond the reefs.
You must watch for the movies which show the first one and then when the movies of this one come along you should see them. We have seen a number of reels of news movies here the pictures of the bomb explosions are really marvelous. Please try to see them.
There is still lots of radioactivity in the lagoon water, but some parts are quite free. I went out in a LCVP yesterday afternoon to deliver films to several of the POM's. I went as a monitor to make the Geiger counts to be sure we were in safe areas. Lots of fun. More soon --
I love you Dear. Your
Carl
July 26 9:3 P.M.
Dearest,
Are you on Enyu gathering shells? Hope your party is a cautious one and not too anxious to start investigations. You know me!
Yesterday your letter written just before William Day came to us -- A little longer getting here than the last one. We watch for the mailman and hope every day for more word -- You have done well to write so often -- "Letter" days are always brighter.
This morning when starting for groceries the battery of the car * hadn't enough juice to turn the starter -- After several tries, with rests between, when I got only groans from the battery (?) -- I called the filling station -- Mr. Jenson's nephew came out -- got me started + I drove to the station -- He tested the charge which showed me as reading very low -- so he charged the battery -- I hated having him do it for I know you don't approve of quick charges -- but I didn't know what else to do -- Evidently my short trips to town aren't enough to charge it -- on charger 1 hr.
Tomorrow we're going to Indep. Ed called tonite to say Mrs. Bolton is being buried tomorrow. Uncle Ed had fallen from a ladder and sprained his ankle and Aunt Pearl was needing some family -- I'm taking the car to be greased at 7:30 A.M. Will buy chicken feed and be on our way. We'll plan to be home before dark.
Canned 3 more quarts of tomatoes tonite. If we ever get a rain we'll be flooded with them -- Have had no moisture since you left and temperatures from 96 to 103ø. Beans are delicious now and we are eating on the biggest head of cabbage I have ever seen -- solid and firm to the heart.
Of course I knew you'd be busy every minute -- can hardly wait for details from you -- I wouldn't have had you miss "the show" for anything.
When watching our sunsets I think of you soon to be watching one there -- Always I send you a "Goodnight" by way of the stars.
Winifred is learning so many new words you will be amazed. She asks for drinks when she wants them -- is struggling with her own name. Loves to wander over the yard and stands with hands behind her watching the chickens many times a day.
All my love,
* The car was a 1941 Ford coupe. I was a little older in this picture than at the time of these letters -- but the car was not much different.
Aboard the U.S.S. Haven
My Dearest Ones,
Yesterday was another special day -- two letters from you -- the one you forgot to put San Francisco on, and the next one. You really can't blame the post office at Lawrence. They're not supposed to guess.
This afternoon I'm sitting on deck after being very lazy all day. During the last few days we have been working at night. The films come in in the evening after the boats have been tracing the radioactive area all day. We develop the films worn by the personnel in order to measure the dose they received while on duty. That means we get to bed rather late. Actually it doesn't add up to very much work -- in fact, no one works very much nor very efficiently in this show.
After two weeks of observation I find that the general consensus of opinion is that it is essentially an Army-Navy show which was going to be held anyway -- with or without the participation of the scientists. If they wanted to come along -- fine, but just don't expect the primary purpose to be scientific and likewise don't expect too much to say about it. In some cases there seems to have been excellent cooperation. On the other hand a number of scientists have come out and left in disgust -- partly I gather their own fault.
We have been anchored off Enyu island just at the entrance of the lagoon for several days -- since Baker Day in fact. Within the time required to write this much we and the rest of the ships around us have weighed anchor and pulled out farther to sea. I haven't been below to see why but I'm guessing the radioactive area has moved in this direction and we are running. I know of no other reason for moving out. You see it is more than a question of receiving radiation from the water around us -- it is a matter of protecting the drinking water since all we use for drinking and bathing must be distilled from the sea water. If the sea water is too heavily contaminated there is some danger of contaminating the drinking water.
I doubt that you can know quite how good I feel when I get letters from you. It seems such a long time between letters and it took them so long to catch up with me. The one you wrote July 20 came yesterday -- a week to get here part of which may have been due to our being out of mail contact since Baker -1. It should be more regular now that the test is over.
The target ships are still too "hot" (radioactive) for any one to board them. We cannot leave here until the test equipment aboard the target ships has been recovered, that may be several days yet.
I had a real chuckle when I read of you and Alice trying to recover the steer -- cow girls! Evidently not very good ones if you had to call in a cow boy. Please give Dr. Ward my thanks. I'd love to have seen you at it.
As for the rooster you and Alice have my special permission in fact my earnest request to behead him at the first opportunity if you haven't already done it. Whenever he bothers my little girl -- that's the end. Please do it before he has a chance to do any real damage. Don't take any chances.
I'm getting to the point at which I'm torn between the desire to get home as quickly as possibleand the desire to see the thing through now that I'm here. It seems a shame to cut it short yet I'm getting homesick I think. This is such a long time to be away from you -- now I get lonesome for you and lonesome for our little sweetheart.
I'm so glad that Alice is with you and I'm glad to know that Mom was there for several days. It sounds as if you were really busy with tomatoes, steers, roosters and weeds to manage.
I wrote Dr. Dann a few days ago. We must have our dinner party just as soon as possible when I get back. So don't work too hard now.
And so I'm up to date again. Lots of love to my three sweethearts.
Your,
Monday Evening
July 29
Dearest,
This was a grand day -- three more letters from you -- The last one written on Baker Day - 1. Looks as though six days is the best a letter can do -- I which case I won't be able to write you many more unless they could be waiting for you at ports-of-call. I'm glad you'll have the experience of a real ocean voyage although I'll wish it might take less than two weeks.
Your letters are so full of interesting happenings -- so far the experience has been all we hoped it might be -- eh what? I'll send your letter with the sketches of the lagoon to your folks (as a loan).
Todays news says the first investigation of Bikini began today -- which makes us think you must be on Enyu. Nearly a week to wait -- Hope you haven't rushed in.
Today was wash day -- and tomato day -- they are flooding us in spite of no rain. We'll take some to Independence tomorrow. Mr. Choplin * died very suddenly -- is being buried tomorrow and there is nothing for us to do but to go. Think my job will be to take care of the youngsters during the funeral. It was 9:00 o'clock before we got back Saturday -- everything was O.K. but I know it's not wise to be on the road after dark. This time I'm leaving chicken house key with Stevens ** and if we can't get home before dark we'll wait 'til Wednesday. Raymond helped me dump a 100 lbs of chicken feed tonite. Think we'll start eating roosters fast -- they consume too much food and it now costs $5.10/100 lbs.
Uncle Ed fell from the top of a step ladder, in the store, a week ago. Luck was with him and he came up with only a sprained ankle. Says he won't climb anymore. We'll see.
Our Ed is working such long hours he's about sick. Dr. Tom Twyman fell and broke his good leg.
But Winifred has no troubles she is a dear -- Is sleeping longer in the mornings and staying up 'til 7:30 now. In another month you will see much development. Plays alone longer, follows Alice to the garden, remembers that we get ice cream down town and suggests it, trys desperately to put the lace in her shoe but first love remains books and go-bye, think clothes better be included there.
We miss you constantly, Dear, and another month sounds like forever, but I still wouldn't have had you miss this experience for anything.
Goodnight Sweet -- We love you
*Mr. Choplin was the father of my mother's best friend since they were children. It was a friendship that lasted throughout their lives.
** I can't swear to it, but I think the Stevens were the neighbors katty-corner across the road.
Aboard the U.S.S. Haven
My Dearest Sweethearts,
Have just had dinner -- this always comes at 5:30 PM aboard the ship -- breakfast 7:00 A.M., lunch 11:30 dinner -- 17:30. We left the ship this afternoon at 12:00 to go out into the target area -- it is now cleared of radioactivity -- but we were unable to board any ships except a couple of APA's (auxiliary, personnel, assault) in otherwords troop ships. The battle ships were still too "hot." By the way, the Nagato, the big Jap battleship sank during the night. We went over the spot this afternoon -- just a few bubbles and a lot of oil gave evidence of where she was. I had no regrets about her -- she was badly bombed out and damaged from the first A-Bomb. I have several souvenirs -- nothing very exciting but interesting. *
This morning I sent a package -- it will come by regular mail so this should reach you before it does. There is nothing in it of interest -- just some surplus clothes I wanted to get rid of in case I return by air. There are also 3 geiger tubes -- discards -- in it which I hope get through without being broken. You may open the package if you like but be very careful of the inner box in which the geiger tubes are packed. Please handle with care! I did put in one dozen white handkerchiefs which I bought from ship's stores. 10 cents each -- what can you buy in the stores for 10 cents? You know me -- I have another dozen here!
I shall probably send another box soon also miscellaneous -- mostly shells and coral -- a few other items I don't want to have to carry.
I'm undecided about returning -- may come on air lift -- may be on the Haven. I'd rather like to have the two weeks ocean voyage but it may be very dull. I'll save at least two weeks by air lift and seeing you two weeks earlier outweighs by far my desire for two more weeks aboard the Haven. On the other hand there is some doubt whether I can get the air lift -- I may not have a choice. Will let you know as soon as I know.
The weeds are commencing to worry me -- I'm afraid you may get lost in them some day and not be able to find your way back to the house. I certainly would like a few of those tomatoes here.
It's time for me to go below to help develop some films. Thought I might get a letter today but we had no mail delivery. I'll certainly be waiting for one tomorrow. Your letters make me feel so good, dear, but they make me want to come home.
I send my girls lots of love
They still sound like bells, when tapped.
The middle section was once part of a brass andiron.
Aboard the U.S.S. Haven
Dearest Ones,
Since I wrote you yesterday I have had definite word that I am on the air lift list. I am now in the mood to fly back and I was told that there will be definite information in my mail box within 48 hours as to whether we leave here Baker + 13 or Baker + 14. That means Aug. 7 or 8. So I may be leaving here almost by the time you receive this. There will be no point in your writing me after you receive this -- at least until you hear further. If there is any hitch I'll let you know.
I shall probably have to spend a day or possibly two in Berkeley making out vouchers -- the so called processing. Whether I return to Lawrence by train or by air depends as you know on reservation difficulties. When one adds to the railroad fare the pullman and dining costs on the train, there is very little difference between train and plane costs and one saves two days. I certainly don't intend to wait in Berkeley several days for a rail reservation.
We went out into the target area yesterday all afternoon with the intention of going aboard any ships that were not "hot." Got aboard only 3 APA's and 3 LCT's. There was no one aboard the LCT's so we had fun. Major ships were too "hot." It's too early yet to know what I'll do today. More later.
I still love you -- be good to our little sweetheart and give her a kiss for me.
Your
at Bikini
My Sweethearts,
The mail was rich today-- a letter from you and one from Mom. I wonder whether you know how much your letters mean -- I'm really lonely for you and when you mention our little girl I really get homesick. She is such a dear little thing -- I can just see her entertaining everyone in the library -- I wish I could have been there.
I will be soon, too. We received our travel orders today -- the group I am in will leave here Aug 7 or within the preceeding 24 hour period. Our orders say to be packed and ready on a moment's notice during that 24 hour period. This still leaves some uncertainty at this end. Then we don't know how long the stop will be in Hawaii, nor how long we will be in Berkeley. The best I can do will be to wire you from Berkeley as soon as I know how I will get from Berkeley to Lawrence and when. I'll try to write once more from here but there will be no use writing after that because I'd probably beat it home. By the time you receive this one I'll be on my way.
This afternoon I went ashore on Bikini the first time since Baker. I had a bottle of beer -- then Dr. Hursh, Dr. Landsverk and I became bored and decided to hunt coconuts. * Those on the ground are dried and most of those on the trees are green because there are so many looking for them. We wandered through the trees, tried to climb a couple and gave that up. Then came the barbed wire fence which divides the north end of the island from the rest. The north end is restricted and off limits unless one has official business. We decided the trees looked more promising there and crawled thru the fence. We were sure the sentries saw us but they made no move to stop us. About 15 minutes later we had located a good tree and were busily knocking coconuts off when an M.P. (Military Police) came up and informed us that he'd have to take us in. He obligingly waited while we knocked off several more and opened a couple. Then loaded us into a jeep and took us to headquarters. There our names etc. were taken and the M.P. was instructed to escort us to the boat dock and put aboard a motor launch to the Haven. So we got aboard in time to have a cool shower and a good dinner. So there are things to do if one just looks for them. It looks as if we may escape being shot this time!
I'm going to have to be quiet about the food aboard the Haven when I return. We have bacon or ham every morning. We have meat -- roast or stew or something -- for lunch, and baked ham or sirloin steak or something similar for dinner. And all we want. I hope my gray trousers fit when I get into them! Or would you like to let them out again?
The worst thing is that we are really expected to do an hour or two of work every day or so -- at least if we feel like it. I volunteered for an extra job today but was told that my work in photometry might be interferred with. That takes all of an hour a day. I tell myself a dozen times a day that this can't be real -- but it is. It's just one grand vacation, convention, banquet, camping trip and party all rolled into one and paid for in a grand way by Uncle. We have a movie every night -- I've seen ten normal years of movies since I've been here. Everyone goes -- even I!
I have made some interesting contacts -- have met many men I've met before or have wanted to meet. I've made some contacts that may be useful in the future and have met several men I wish we could know better and that I'm sure we would enjoy. Everyone I have met is either from N.Y., Chicago, Rochester, Oak Ridge, Los Alamos, or Berkeley. I'm certainly a lone midwest wolf.
I'm glad you're getting out a little to some visits. I'm glad too that I'm getting back early. It looks now as if I might hit Lawrence almost exactly a month after I left. There will still be more than a month of the summer left. Still time to enjoy it with you without frantically trying to get a lot of things done. I wish you were here to pinch me so I'd be sure it really happened. Under normal conditions it would have required at least 3 weeks to get from Lawrence to here by train and ship. Yet I will have been here 3 weeks out of the month! Talk about magic carpets!
I wish you were here for other reasons. I wish you could sit beside me on the deck and look out over the vast unbroken expanse of the blue Pacific and watch the sun slowly sink below the horizon in a burst of golden and crimson clouds. I wish you could stand at the rail with me as we trace out the constellations in the brilliant stars. You can see the stars all the way to the horizon. The big dipper and north star are very low in the sky. I wish you were with me because I love you.
Your
*One of the souvenirs he brought back was a coconut in its husk. I remember coconuts from the supermarket -- but that was the only one I ever saw husk-and-all.
Thursday -- July (crossed out) Aug 1
10:00 P.M.
Carl, Dear
This has been quite a day -- Just finished canning 22 pts. of tomato juice. Am this late because I took time out to oil the road. * We put two barrels full on tonite. With Mr. Steven's guidance I hooked the trailer with no damage done. Dale came to help Mr. S. adjust the barrels. Alice and Eloise rode on the storage box and Winifred was very happy on the back seat. Quite a party!
Winifred has now become a personality to herself -- She says "Win-fre (a bit hazy) wants milk" "wants celery" "wants doll" and on and on -- Then she says "I like Da-da," "I like Ah-wiss" etc. And her "dressing up" becomes funnier daily -- She gets a prize concoction on and climbs the steps to the big mirror ** then we hear her chat and admire at length.
Our trip to Independence had no hitches. We stayed over nite and came back in time for supper yesterday. I left Winifred with Aunt Jane *** Tuesday.
We sent flowers to Mr. Choplin's funeral and I helped arrange flowers and took the five other ladies to the cemetery. Went by the house afterwards and then we were too late to start home. Bunked at Ed's and took our time getting away yesterday. Stopped for a visit at Aunt Annie's **** on the way.
Have three cases of polio ***** in town so we're staying home -- Swimming pool has been closed and Alice is forgoing movies + library books and will stay home with Winifred while I shop for groceries. Will have to hunt something to make up for her dull life --
Called Dr. Asher's office for an appointment yesterday and the first opening is August 31st.
It seems like three months rather than three weeks since you left us in spite of the fact that everything has run so smoothly. Somehow we'll manage to hold out 'til September and the happy day that brings you home to us.
Good night Dear -- I love you always
*Oiling the road -- The road in front of the house was a dirt road that sent a lot of dust into the air whenever a vehicle drove along it. So my father rigged up a flat trailer with a place for an oil drum, and a line that fed the oil into a kind of a sprayer-bar at the back of the trailer -- as I remember it, it was just a piece of steel pipe with holes drilled every few inches, so that when he drove along the road, and someone on the trailer opened the valve, the oil was released through the horizontal pipe in a kind of drizzle. It kept the dust down. I remember this clearly as something my father did for many years, untill the road was finally paved.
**The "big mirror" was really huge -- about 3' by 5' -- from my grandmother's dress shop. It lived at the top of the stairs when I was a child.
*** Aunt Jane = Grace's mother's sister
**** Aunt Annie = another sister of Grace's mother
***** Polio -- Those who have grown up since the advent of polio vaccines can probably not imagine the anxiety parents felt -- and the restrictions they imposed -- when "polio season" came around in the summer. As indicated in the letter, public places where children might come together were often closed. Though I was too young to remember this particular summer, I do remember other summers when I was restricted to the house and surrounding acreage.
Aboard the U.S.S. Haven
My Dear Ones,
This will probably be the last letter to you before we leave. Since this is Saturday night, it will probably not get away from here until late tomorrow. It should reach you about the 11th and I hope to be home within a day or two of that. The show is almost completely over here and there would be no point in staying except to have another three weeks of doing nothing. I become more and more impatient to be with you and H. as the time draws closer. It would be very difficult for me to live a life like this very long. Today I have done almost nothing except sit on deck and read. I can't help feeling guilty at such a life of ease, but there is simply nothing to do. Almost everyone is in the same boat -- they read, go to the officers club to do nothing but drink, play poker or just lie in the sun. Very few are really doing anything useful except those who were in charge of certain phases from the very beginning. One of the men, Dr. Fink, has spent most of the last 3 days packing a beautiful piece of coral he found on Amen island.
Lieut. Martyn * came up looking for Jones who is a monitor. He had a special call for two special monitors and asked Jones if he could go. Jones agreed and Martyn looked expectantly at me and said they needed another. Although I am not assigned as a monitor I have gone as one a couple of times so I said I'd be glad to go. It turned out that the request had come from the McKinley for two monitors to accompany Admiral Blandy! So off we went in a boat to meet the Admiral on Enyu Island. We landed, a truck took us across the island and the two of us met Admiral Blandy + his Commodore Aide on the seaward beach. They were just walking along looking for sea shells. We introduced ourselves and the four of us continued our walk along the beach picking up pretty shells and chatting about the operation etc. The Admiral actually was looking for a good beach with water deep enough and free of jagged coral for the men to swim in. The beach on Bikini has become contaminated and polluted and swimming has been prohibited.
The Admiral seemed a likable sort of person, certainly not stuffy or pompous. You could not have singled him out of a crowd of us except by the 3 stars on his collar. We had a very pleasant couple of hours. I was very glad of the chance to meet him under such conditions, having quite naturally wondered what he was like. It was a lucky break.
Monitoring, by the way, is nothing more than using a small geiger counter to test for the presence of radioactive substances. There was none on Enyu so we had nothing to do but visit.
This Lieut. Martyn I mentionwed above comes from Troy, N.Y., knows your cousin John Martyn and knows Bob. He says he is a distant relative. His father was an Edward Martyn. Thought you might be interested.
There is just time to go on deck for a look at our star before I turn in. It seems strange to think that you are probably sleeping peacefully now but it's almost time for our little sweetheart to say "Hallo Ah-wiss." Tell Alice Hello for me too. I'm glad I can get back before she goes home. I'll bring her a pretty shell for being a good girl.
Love to you all,
* The name Martyn was the point here, as it was the same as my mother's maiden name -- an unusual spelling.
letter written August 4
Sunday Morning Aug 4
Dearest One
A letter from you yesterday and one the day before -- The one that you started Baker Day came yesterday -- the other was written on the 29th as your boat was "running from radioactivity." We relish every word and I count the days until I can have you close and hear the many things you can't write. When the radio told us you were about 10 miles at sea we knew you would have a good view of the explosion. Hope you are meeting interesting people -- How about those sharing your cabin -- O.K.?
I'm on the "patio" * -- having just fed, salted and watered the chickens and stock. Winifred and Alice are sleeping. They are both honeys. Winifred is becoming more + more of an imp -- teases Alice and then runs to Mama for protection. If reprimanded then she comes for a love and goes on about some other activity -- Asks to be rocked before bed -- then rolls over and is asleep almost immediately. When a car turns in the drive she says "Da-da?" and goes to look. When strange men are around she goes close and then shakes her head with "No Da-da." You see we both need you, Dear.
Today we'll all go to church. We're having our first meeting in Danforth Chapel on the "Hill."** Your mother wrote that they might drive up this afternoon. If they come we'll freeze ice cream and have a snack of supper.
The Earl Jones's were here for supper last night. Alice and I both agree that they are an addition to any group. Sorry they are leaving Lawrence.
Friday we visited Haskell *** -- saw Mrs. Wiseman and she sent us on a tour with a guide. She says Mr. W. has been deferred from the army until November.
You have a letter from a Mrs. L. H. Schenck -- asking you to speak at a noon luncheon on October 7 at the Topeka Woman's Club -- The Y.W.C.A. and the League of Women Voters would also be present. This is their opening forum for the year. Mr. Ethan P. Allen told them you are at Bikini. If you agree she would like pictures + education and experience information. They will pay expenses. If you do it I'll try to find a picture to send over.
A bill came from Smith Motors for $4.45 -- Did you not pay them the day you left?
Time now to get Winifred and go on with the days routine.
All my love, Dear, always --
*The "patio" in those days was a concrete slab between the back door and the driveway that led to the barn.
** Danforth Chapel is a tiny, plain chapel at the top of "The Hill" on which the earliest buildings of the University of Kansas were constructed. To this day, the campus is often referred to as "the
Hill."
*** "Haskell" was in those days "Haskell Institute" -- a high school for First Nations' teenegers. It is now Haskell Indian Nations University.
In one way, it seems appropriate to end with the phrase "go on with the day's routine."
In another way, it seems very odd. The Bomb changed the world. And we go on with our daily routines.
The Journey -- how he got from Lawrence, Kansas to Bikini in only 6 days
letter written July 26
Grace
letter written in pen on plain onionskin paper
at Bikini
Sunday, July 28, 1946
Carl
letter written July 29
Grace
letter written in pen on plain paper
at Bikini
July 30, 1946
Your
Carl
* I still have a candlestick my father made, whose top and bottom are bells from the Nagato.
letter written in pen on plain paper
at Bikini
July 31, 1946
Carl
letter written in pen on plain paper
August 1, 1946
Carl
letter written August 1 -- addressed to the U.S.S. Haven, but re-addressed and forwarded to his home in Lawrence.
Grace
The letter is written in pen on plain paper
at Bikini
August 3, 1946
Carl
This was, of the documents I have, his last letter to her. She wrote one more, addressed to the U.S.S. Haven, which was also re-addressed to their home.
7:00
Grace
That's all of the letters.
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